Wednesday, September 28, 2005

On Not Being Russian and Other Such Stuff



Well, since I think my blog readership is now up to a whopping five people (besides myself) I thought it was time for another post.

Mongolia and Russia used to be very good friends and still like each other fairly well; in fact, Mongolia was the second communist country in the world. Many changes occurred in Mongolia due to Russian influence and input; the alphabet was changed, architecture and cities became drastically different, the educational system, governmental structure, and military were all greatly altered. Because of this close relationship, all Mongolia school children studied Russian; I’m not certain, but I believe that until recently, Russian was the official second language of Mongolia.

Up until the late 1980’s there were many Russians living and working here in Mongolia. Since most Mongolians knew Russian, there was little need for the Russians to learn Mongolian. And, since for several decades Russians accounted for 99.9% of the foreigners in Mongolia, it is often assumed that I am Russian because I don’t have a small Mongolian nose or dark hair. “Is she Russian or English?” I hear people asking each other as I walk through the market (that I’ve been walking through once a week for the past four years). Groups of school children will greet me by saying, “Hello” and then they'll say, “Ooh, I said hello to that Russian woman…” and occasionally one of their friends will reply, “She isn’t Russian.” Taxi drivers will start talking to me in Russian and will continue trying to talk to me in Russian even after I tell them, in Mongolian, that I don’t speak Russian. Shopkeepers will occasionally answer my queries in Russian, which can lead to utter confusion for all parties. This is all fine except that I don’t actually speak Russian. My spoken vocabulary is limited to: Yes, no, what’s your name? My name is ______. I am American, tea with milk please, thank you, let’s go, 404, Happy New Year, I don’t know, and (ironically enough) I understand.

I thought that I’d help people out a bit by telling them, in Mongolian, that I’m not Russian so as to eliminate some communication problems. Enter the “I’m not Russian” shirts… should you, too, have this problem, you can purchase the shirts at Mongol Mama at Cafepress.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Scotch

My coworker and apartment-mate, Danielle, and I entertain ourselves by writing songs about life in Mongolia; it’s become tradition for us to perform at least one during our organization's Fall training each year. This year's hit was “Scotching Fiend” to the tune of “Dancing Queen”. There seem to be certain phases that everyone goes through as they adjust to living here, and one of those phases involves an obsession with scotch tape. Scotch, as it is called here, is between one and two inches wide, comes on big rolls, and can be used for anything. Last spring I went through a phase where I was scotching everything; especially any teaching aides that I created—to make them last, you know! Anyway, this scotching phase is what gave birth to our song. Enjoy!

Scotching Fiend
I can scotch, I can jive, having the time of my life
See my skill, watch me work, I am the Scotching Fiend.


Friday night and I need to know what is the best route to go
For fixing the toilet, for picking up cat hair
I think I need some scotch…

It’s a great thing to keep close by
It works for anything; just give it a try

Covering your papers, filling window cracks
I’ll never go back

And when I get the chance

I am the Scotching Fiend,
Giving things such a lovely sheen
Scotching Fiend, cover those papers—keep them clean
I can scotch, I can jive, having the time of my life
See my skill, watch me work, I am the Scotching Fiend.




The Scotching Queens, I mean, Fiends...





For those of you who also struggle with scotch addictions, you'll be happy to know that you can now get your very own "Scotching Fiend" shirts! Once again, Mongol Mama is the place to go.